Second verse, same as the first: Elect Gar-ed to the Baseball Hall of Fame

The Baseball Hall of Fame (HOF) will release the names of Major League Baseball players eligible for Cooperstown immortality. Again, the Dog Denizens of Genesee Park (DDGP) makes the case for at least 75 percent of the Baseball Writers Association of America (BBWAA) voters to elect Seattle Mariner Edgar "Gar-Ed" Martinez for induction next July.

Although he played primarily as a designated hitter, Marinez put out offense-driven statistics that deserve due consideration. In 18 seasons -- some cut short with injuries -- Martinez cranked out 2,247 hits in 7,213 at-bats for a .312 career batting average. Martinez belted 514 doubles and 309 home runs, and drove in 1,261 runs. His average, on-base (.418) and slugging (.515) percentages exceed those of indisputable first-time HOF selections Ernie "Mr. Cub" Banks (.274, .330, .500), Reggie "Mr. October" Jackson (.262., .356, .4900 and "Captain" Carl Yastrzemski (.285, .379., 462).

Martinez continues to face the designated-hitter bias and bashing of so-called baseball authorities including sportscaster Bob "Mr. Know-It-All" Costas. But other -- and larger -- obstacles loom. First, because the BBWAA selected only one ballplayer -- a very deserving Andre "Hawk" Dawson -- to the HOF for 2010, the next ballot is cluttered with overlooked candidates who will garner more votes this time around. These individuals include: Roberto Alomar, Bert Blyleven (in his 14th year of eligibility), Barry Larkn, Tim "Rock" Raines and Lee Smith. The 2011 rookie crop of HOF candidates includes those likely to earn HOF selection sometime in the next 15 years -- sooner if not later (Jeff Bagwell, John "Generalissimo" Franco, Julio Franco, Larry Walker). Another group includes those players whose candidacies will receive serious consideration (Kevin Brown, Marquis Grissom, Tino Martinez, John Olerud, Benito Santiago, B.J. Surhoff). Yet another group will receive votes but not enough to remain on the 2012 ballot (Carlos Baerga, Bret Boone, Raúl Mondesi, José Offerman, Rey Sanchez).

And then there's the 180-pound -- probably more now -- proverbial elephant in the living room (aka, Rafael Palmero) with whom voters likely share conflicting emotions. Does the BBWAA place more weight on the HOF stats (.288, 3,020 hits, 569 home runs, 1,385 runs batted in) than the positive test for steroids in Palmeiro's last season? We'll know in January.

Edgar received votes from 36 percent of the BBWAA this year. Martinez now must compete with a large pool of contenders and hope to receive the compulsory five percent of votes to stay on the 2012 ballot.

Last year we likened Martinez to a chocolate lab at the Genesee Dog Park. The HOF needs more chocolate labs than pit bulls.

Things would been less complicated if the BBWAA listened to us last year and voted Martinez in the 2010 HOF.

Luck of the Irish: Local canine Clooney wins the Purina National Dog Show

Congratulations to Clooney, the Irish Setter from nearby Normandy Park who captured "Best in Show" honors this week at the Purina National Dog Show in Philadelphia.

We've seen local dogs vying in national competitions, including Westminster. Rare, though, do we enjoy the opportunity of watching a local boy or girl taking top honors during a national telecast. In a year without presumptive favorites, the three-year old Clooney has skyrocketed to the top of the list of frontrunners during the 2010-2011 season, which culminates in America with Westminster next February.

Clooney's victory is all the remarkable because the dog and his handler, Peter Kubatz, have only worked together since August. Interviewed after the championship trophies and ribbons were awarded, Kubatz said he took on the assignment because the Irish setter represented all the good traits of the breed: "He's a totally rollicking personality, totally attentive, he just loves to be shown."

Kudos to the champ for generating more good pub for Normandy Park than the municipality of a little less than 7,000 has received in a month -- hell, a couple decades -- of Sundays. Admittedly, we in the Lovely Rainier Valley don't understand your self-described "Manhattan Village Sub-Area planning process." Probably because if people likened our 'hood to a New York borough that the Lovely Rainier Valley would probably be the Bronx. Which would make Normandy Park... Seacaucus, NJ?

As much as we'd love to entertain a celebrity at the Genesee Dog Park (GDP), we'd advise Clinton to journey to "Gladiator Park" only if you come with an entourage equipped with Tasers to use against the aggressive canines that blur the lines between rollicking play and fighting.

Better yet, stop at Full Tilt for a scoop -- nothing with chocolate, raisins or nuts -- and call it a day.

Don't touch that Tofurky... er, dial

Happy Thanksgiving from your friends at the Dog Denizens of Genesee Park (DDGP)!

If you are fortunate -- or damned -- into hosting the holiday meal, you are undoubtedly knee-deep in chopping, mincing, basting and baking. As you putter about the kitchen, you could watch the Macy's Thanksgiving parade or a trio of National Football League (NFL) games with almost-guaranteed results. New England Patriots v. Detroit Lions? New Orleans Saints v. Dallas Cowboys? Cincinnati Bengals v. New York Jets? Hell, why not the Seattle Seahawks v. the Spokane Shock of the Arena Football League (AFL)? Oh, wait... the last match up might not prove so one-sided.

No, you'd rather tune into a dog show. NBC is airing the Purina National Dog Show today from 12 pm to 2 pm Pacific Standard Time (PST) following the Macy's parade. (The real parade on Thanksgiving through Manhattan -- as opposed to the wanna-be procession in downtown Seattle on Black Friday.) Last year's competition saw Sadie the Scottish terrier -- the bitch that would capture the "Best in Show" title at the Westminster Kennel Club two months later -- take the blue ribbon. Could 2010 be the Long Coat Chihuahua's year?

The early money is on the Brussels Griffon.

The Purina National Dog Show airs from 12 pm to 2 pm PST on Thanksgiving Day on NBC.

There's no penalty box at the dog park... get your aggressive mutt outta there

You thought you'd enjoy today's "snow day" by taking your white German shepherd to the Genesee Dog Park. White Fang, you reasoned, would enjoy romping in the snow and playing with his fellow canines.

Trouble was, White Fang did not seem to share your assessment. Your shepherd acted aggressively with the other dogs, and started at least one fight.

Worse, you didn't attempt to intervene. When the owner of the other dog confronted you, you appeared shocked by White Fang's conduct. "I don't understand what happened," you gushed. "He's such a sweetheart at home."

Even worse, you failed to remove White Fang from the park. Instead you leashed him up and kept him the park. And then you petted him, thereby reassuring his brutish behavior.

Irresponsible dog owner, what the hell were you thinking?

Maybe you didn't recognize that the darling doggie living in your cute Craftsman near the lake transforms into Cujo when he leaves your 'hood. But once you became aware of your dog's behavior at the park today, you should leashed up White Fang and left the off-leash park. What good would come out tethering up your dog and remaining on the premises? Do you think he felt any more secure and serene leashed up amongst other dogs that freely ran and played around him?

Once White Fang displayed aggression, you should regain control of your dog and leave the park. There is no "penalty box" at the dog park... you should remove your dog from the premises before he instigates another confrontation. Apparently, common sense is not within your modus operandi.

To the rest of the owners at the park: Call the Seattle Animal Shelter at 386-PETS (386-7387) if you observe aggression at the dog park.

Collie didn't see the snow coming

Meteorologists predicted snowfall this week -- and anywhere between one and three inches fell yesterday in the Greater Seattle area.

Weather Prognosticator O'Doul the Collie didn't anticipate the snowfall. We checked in today with Mount Baker, O'Doul's official spokesman. Tony had reported that the collie had been shedding a steady amount of his summer coat -- but not an amount that would affirm the La Niña winter that National Oceanic Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) predicts. Nor did the amount of shedding thus far, Tony said, forecast this week's snowfall.

"He forecasts winters, not snowstorms," Tony said. "It's science in a bottle."

Zoom-zoom along South Genesee Street... there's no repercussion

Installation of the new athletic area -- large enough to boast a football field with goal posts -- at Genesee Park means more users and more traffic along South Genesee Street.

You'd think that the city, in his infinite wisdom, would adjust the speed limit along South Genesee Street along the perimeter. Guess again. Traveling east-bound on Genesee, the posted speed limit is 30 miles per hour at South Genesee and 41st Avenue South.

Is 30 miles per hour kosher under the law? Seattle Municipal Code (SMC) 11.52.100 says: "Except in instances where a lower maximum speed is provided... no person shall operate any vehicle at a speed in excess of twenty (20) miles per hour when passing any marked school or playground crosswalk or when within any marked school or playground zone when such marked crosswalk or zone is fully posted with school or playground speed limit signs. The speed zone at the crosswalk shall extend three hundred (300) feet in either direction from the marked crosswalk, and the school or playground zone may extend three hundred (300) feet from the border of the school or playground, but may include only area consistent with active school or playground use."

http://clerk.ci.seattle.wa.us/~scripts/nph-brs.exe?d=CHAP&s1=11.52.h2.&Sect6=HITOFF&l=20&p=1&u=/~public/chap1.htm&r=1&f=G

Some design genius created a street-level athletic field, which seems like a recipe for disaster when the errant ball journeys off the field and onto Genesee.

Seattle politicos tell us that the city is busted -- not merely flat broke, but millions of dollars in the hole. Couldn't the city generate revenue by busting speeders on Genesee? A human park denizens complained to the city about speeders... and asked that the city's Department of Transportation (DOT) install speed bumps -- or in the nomenclature of the DOT, "physical traffic calming devices." (Seriously.) Given that Genesee is a two-lane arterial -- and the favored "road diet" is not plausible -- the city could install "speed cushions" to address the problem.

http://www.seattle.gov/transportation/ntcp_physical.htm

Progress at the city moves as slowly as If you want to see the speed limit reduced on Genesee, contact the City of Seattle's Department of Transportation:

http://www.seattle.gov/transportation/contact.htm

Maybe the city will revisit the speeding issue before a soccer mom or somebody's child gets creamed.

All hail King Felix!

Felicitaciones a Félix Hernández, el 2010 de la Liga Americana ganador del Cy Young!

Kudos to the Baseball Writers Association of America (BBWAA) today for getting it right by honoring Seattle Mariners ace Felix Hernandez with the Cy Young award as the top pitcher in the American League (AL). At the end of the regular season, we harbored our doubts that the BBWAA would recognize King Felix's 30 quality starts (at least six innings pitched in a game that yields no more than three earned runs) over New York Yankee C.C. Sabathia's 21-7 record. In the end, King Felix (167 votes) outpolled Tampa Bay Ray David Price (111) and the Damned Yankee (102).

Broadcaster Joe Morgan characterized Hernandez as undeserving for compiling a 13-12 record. King Felix led the league in innings pitched (249.67), quality starts and complete games (six). Hernandez (2.27, 323, six, 1.057) bested Price (2.72, 188, two, 1.193) and Sabathia (3.18, 197, two, 1.191) in earned run average, strikeouts, complete games and WHIP.

Some derided Hernandez for supposedly not pitching in pressure situations. Seattle fans would contend that a pitcher doesn't know real pressure until he recognizes that his battery won't "get back" any run he surrenders. Roy Halliday, this year's National League (NL)) Cy Young winner, denigrated his AL counterpart's victory: "I think, ultimately, you look at how guys are able to win games. Sometimes the run support isn't there, but you sometimes just find ways to win games."

Spoken like a pitcher with a Philadelphia battery that included Ryan Howard, Jimmy Rollins, Chase Utley, Jayson Werth and Raul Ibañez behind him -- as opposed to Felix and the supporting cast of Eight Men Making Outs. (Actually, more than eight when you tally the list: Chone Figgins, Josh Wilson, Adam Moore, Milton Bradley, Ken Griffey Jr., Rob Johnson, Franklin Gutierrez, Ryan Langerhans, Michael Saunders, Russell Branyan, Matt Tuiasosopo. You can't argue against the idea that Hernandez would have copped 20-plus wins if he enjoyed the New York Yankees' run support.

On a side note, it will be interesting to see how Chuckie and Howie attempt to address the Mariners' woeful offensive output this year. With Chuckie and Howie in charge, maybe one of these unneeded free-agent pickups:

• Chicago White Sox First baseman/outfielder Mark Kotsay (.239, 8 HR, 39 RBI, .306 OBP, .376 SLG) reminiscent of bygone first baseman Casey Kotchman;
• Minnesota Infielder Nick Punto (.238, 1 HR, 20 RBI, .313 OBP, .302 SLG) whose batting stats would make him feel right at home with the other light-hitting Seattle infielders;
• Los Angeles Dodger right fielder Reed Johnson (.262, 2 HR, 15 RBI, .291 OBP, .366 SLG), a light hitter with Chonne Figgins (.259, 2 HR, 35 RBI, 42 SB, .340 OBP, .303 SLG) and Franklin Guiterrez (.245, 12 HR, 64 RBI, .303 OBP, .393 SLG);
• Seattle Mariner/Philadelphia Phillie Mike Sweeney (.231, 2 HR, 8 RBI, .310 OBP, .385 SLG). Welcome back, Kotter!

If King Felix were a Genesee Park dog, he'd probably be a bulldog: tough and tenacious, the irresistible and immovable force on the mound.

Congrats, Felix. Look for a place in your home to display your new piece of bric-a-brac. Funny how a butt-ugly -- but highly coveted -- trophy can evoke heated discussion.

Can't see my tracks... the city didn't install enough light (or see it)

For those who wondered about the benefits in the renovation of Genessee Park, the answer is as clear as the off-leash area at 7 pm Pacific Standard Time (PST): Not much.

The City of Seattle's Parks Department plan took care to install the lights over the new play field in such a manner that we would derive much -- if any -- use from the night-time illumination. While the western portion of the park has some lighting, the remainder of the off-leash area remains relatively dark.

The installation of the new athletic area -- large enough to boast a football field with goal posts -- means more users and less-available parking on South Genesee Street. Lest you have enough concerns or complaints, wait until next year in the late summer/early fall when soccer and football seasons are in full gear.

Bring your high-powered flashlight if you come to the off-leash area after 5 pm PST.

Beware: Larger issues loom.

To be continued...

Is it winter yet? The collie isn't telling (yet)

It's the middle of November, so we're checking in with Weather Prognosticator O'Doul the Collie. Mount Baker resident Tony, O'Doul's owner and spokesman, reports that the collie's shedding was in "abeyance" over the past couple weeks. However, the pattern of heavy shedding of the collie's summer coat has resumed. Unlike the National Oceanic Atmospheric Administration (NOAA), which has predicted a La Niña winter with heavy snowfall, Tony says that the amount of shedding is "indeterminate" of the severity of winter. Tony estimates that he has collected enough collie hair to fill a 20-ounce, "micro can" of garbage.

If NOAA is right, more than a few people will find themselves nursing colds or flus this winter. You can purchase an over-the-counter cold remedy at the local drugstore... or you can fix yourself a Hot Toddy, a concoction of tea, honey, lemon and alcohol.

Hot Toddy

• 1 oz. of brandy or whiskey
• ¾ glass of tea
• 1 tablespoon of honey
• ¼ of a lemon
• 1 cup of hot water

Prepare the tea.

Coat the bottom of a mug with honey.

Add the liquor and juice from the lemon.

Pour the steaming tea into the mug and stir.

Garnish with a cinnamon stick, star anise or lemon slice.

If you had only obtained the flu shot when the opportunity arose...

Say "thank you" to a veteran today

Happy Veterans Day from your friends at the Dog Denizens of Genesee Park (DDGP)!

How did Veterans Day come about? you might ask. Although World War II ended on June 28, 1919, an Armistice -- a cessation of fighting between the Allies and Germans -- occurred on the eleventh day of the eleventh month in 1918. November 11, 1918 is regarded as "the war to end all wars." President Woodrow Wilson proclaimed November 11, 1919 as the First Armistice Day. Business would suspend at 11 am for parades and public meetings.

Armistice Day became a federal holiday on November 11, 1938 in commemoration of World War I veterans. In 1954, Congress renamed Armistice Day "Veterans Day" to honor all former service members.

On Memorial Day, we submitted a list of movies that we would have aired in honor of the holiday if we controlled Comcast. In honor of Veterans Day, we submit a list of the movies about members of our armed services and veterans in no particular order of significance. Unlike the Memorial Day list, which featured movies involving death during active duty, the Veterans Day list includes movies about military service.

• The Best Years of Our Lives (1946): Myrna Loy, Fredric March, Dana Andrews, Teresa Wright, Harold Russell, Virginia Mayo and Hoagy Carmichael. William Wyler, director.
• The Caine Mutiny (1954): Humphrey Bogart, Van Johnson, José Ferrer, Fred McMurray, Robert Francis, E.G. Marshall. Edward Dmytryk, director.
• Mister Roberts (1955): Henry Fonda, James Cagney, William Powell, Jack Lemmon, Ward Bond. John Ford, Melvyn LeRoy, Joshua Logan (uncredited), directors.
• Apocalypse Now (1979): Martin Brando, Martin Sheen, Robert Duvall, Laurence Fishburne, Sam Bottoms, Dennis Hopper. Francis Ford Copolla, director.
• Stalag 17 (1953): William Holden, Don Taylor, Otto Preminger, Robert Strauss, Harvey Lembeck, Peter Graves. Billy Wilder, director.
• Sergeant York (1941): Gary Cooper, Walter Brennan, Joan Leslie, Ward Bond, George Tobias, Noah Berry Jr. Howard Hawks, director.
• Strategic Air Command (1955): James Stewart, June Allyson, Barry Sullivan, Jay C. Flippen. Anthony Mann, director.
• Good Morning, Vietnam (1987): Robin Williams, Forest Whitaker, Bruno Kirby, Robert Wuhl, Richard Portnow, J.T. Walsh, Tung Thanh Tran. Barry Levinson, director.
• The Guns of Navarone (1961): Gregory Peck, David Niven, Anthony Quinn, Irene Papas, James Darren, Richard Forbes. J. Lee Thompson, director.
• Crimson Tide (1995): Denzel Washington, Gene Hackman, George Dzunda, Viggo Mortenson, James Gandolfini, Rick Schroder. Tony Scott, director.

Admittedly, there are are movies involving women veterans. I couldn't bring myself to list GI Jane.

To commemorate the holiday, Dick's Drive-In is serving free hamburgers or cheeseburgers to veterans and active-duty members. Show up in uniform or provide another form of identification for your free beef.

If there's a broadcast heaven...

The idea of a baseball broadcast without announcer Dave Niehaus -- the undisputed "voice of Seattle baseball" -- seems unfathomable. Niehaus, who broadcast the Mariners' inaugural game on April 6, 1977, passed away today.

The man who broadcast more than 5,200 games was arguably the Job of Major League Baseball (MLB). Although the Seattle organization spent millions upon millions of dollars on player salaries, Niehaus never enjoyed the opportunity to call the play-by-play of a Mariners World Series. Niehaus' ability to draw a listener into the game is unquestionable. Always energetic and optimistic, never apathetic or sardonic, Niehaus never conveyed that Chone Figgins... Richie Sexson... Bob Kearney... at the plate with men on base and two outs didn't constitute automatic failure. You never heard fear in his voice when Niehaus announced that José Mesa... Bobby Ayala... Edwin Nuñez... was warming up in the bullpen with Oakland Athletics at the corners and a slim one-run Seattle lead.

We would've bought whatever Niehaus was selling us. He would've enjoyed one hell of a career selling securities to cash-strapped buyers.

We'll miss you, Dave.

DAVE NIEHAUS

19 February 1935 to 10 November 2010

San Francisco takes a Giant step... and Seattle remains stuck in first gear

Congratulations to the San Francisco Giants: the Wagyu carpaccio of this year's post-season competition... and the 2010 World Champions.

At first blush, the Giants and Seattle Mariners appear dissimilar in style. Compiling a 88-74 record in 2009, the Giants finished a disappointing three games from a wild-card berth and seven games out of the division title. Finishing 12 games out of the division title in 2009, the Mariners appeared absolutely giddy with a 85-77 record. The Mariners pulled off a high-profile, three-way trade with Philadelphia and Toronto to land Lee, the 2008 Cy Young winner. The Giants formed a roster of self-described "misfits" and "castaways".

Like the stay-at-home-in-October Mariners, the Giants lacked a bona-fide slugger, a la Albert Pujols, Joey Votto or Josh Hamilton. Unlike the Mariners, the Giants battery came through in the clutch and stripped Texas Rangers ace Cliff Lee -- the guy whose acquisition was suppose to secure Seattle's way to the postseason -- of the "S' on his chest and red cape... and rendered him vulnerable and hittable in a Jason Vargas fashion. The players of the ball club on the Bay earned World Series bling -- and the guys on the team on the Sound watched the Series on their plasma televisions in the comfort of their respective media rooms.

Imagine what the Giants could have done with Ichiro Suzuki and Felix Hernandez on the payroll.

Imagine what the Mariners might have achieved with Lee and Tim Lincecum -- the University of Washington pitching star spurned for Brandon Morrow in the 2006 Major League Baseball (MLB) draft -- on the roster.

While the Giants have earned Dom Perignon to accompany the Wagyu carpaccio they emulate, the Mariners deserve the "two buck Chuck" to polish off the chipped beef on toast that they resembled this year. The cynical amongst us suspect our home team's prospects won't change until the Mariner ownership deep sixes Chief Executive Officer Howard Lincoln and President Chuck Armstrong.