What do dogs give up for Lent?

With Lent in full swing, Christians are practicing penance by forsaking food or other activities until the Ninth Hour of Great Thursday (three days before Easter).

Practicing humans "give up" cherished items, such as red meat, caffeinated beverages, or chocolate. Others forsake activities such as surfing the Internet, playing video games, or... well, you get the idea. (Wouldn't be nice if the so-called "elite" cyclists gave up using Lake Washington Boulevard as their training area for Lent?)

Question: What do dogs give up for Lent? Here are some suggestions:

• Australian cattle dogs and shepherds: Herding. As Oprah says, go outside the box. Try being the herdee.
• Bassett hounds, beagles, bloodhounds, et al.: Baying. Try talking with your hands.
• Chihuahuas, Yorkshire terriers and other purse dogs: Your Burberry, Coach, and Louis Vuitton carriers. Try walking. God gave you four legs for a reason.
• Cordigan and Welsh corgis: Nipping at the heels. Try being leader of the pack for a change.
• Field and springer spaniels, pointers, Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retrievers: Fowl. For a moment, we lost our senses and considered suggesting pork, "the other white meat." Try fish on Friday... or soy-based proteins.
• Labrador and golden retrievers: Tennis balls and Frisbees. Don't rely on Wilson, Penn and Wham-O as your means of entertainment.
• Poodles: Grooming services. Try alternate styles or hair-care products like Afro Sheen or Brylcreem. A little dab'll do ya.
• Parson Russell, rat terriers, et. al.: Hyperactivity. Take it down a notch. As the Chairman of the Board said, "Nice and easy does it every time."