Showing posts with label You say it's your vegan birthday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label You say it's your vegan birthday. Show all posts

Monday, July 5, 2010

Happy Birthday, CJ!

As your mother doesn't remember if your birthday is July fifth or sixth without consulting your papers, we're going to play it safe and post today. Happy birthday, CJ!

You are a testament that a great dog can enjoy the good life when paired with a human who treats you like the princess that you are.

If only your mother allowed you to depart from the path of the canine vegan.

Seriously, though... could you really imagine living life as a dog vegan? No Beggin' Strips, Pup-peroni sticks, Liv-A-Snaps... or anything with the modest hint of meat. Such forbearance is enough to make any well-adjusted dog "go Stetson" on the well-meaning but delusional, Soy Joy-slurping, tofu-chomping tree hugger. Sink the teeth into the forearm, let it bleed.

In honor of your birthday and a popular fruit of your former residence, we will toast you with the Midwestern-hip cocktail of the Wolverine State. It goes without saying that alcohol is poisonous to dogs.

Cherry martini
2 oz. vodka
¼ oz. Drambuie liquor
¼ oz. cherry liqueur

Pour liquids in martini shaker. Add crushed ice. Count to five. Shake vigorously.
Strain into martini glass. Garnish with maraschino cherry.

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Another birthday, another vegan cake

Happy birthday to our friend in rural Pierce County!

Someday in the not-so-distant future we will have to exchange our Christmas presents -- and now your birthday gifts -- before Flag Day. Hopefully, of this year.

If we controlled Comcast, we'd air all-day marathons of Pawn Stars and America's Most Wanted in your honor. Of course, if we controlled Comcast, we'd also deep-six NBC's tape-delayed-for-primetime-TV telecasts of the Olympics for west coast viewers. We'd also remove any traces of the oxymoron known as "Fox News".

For now, have a Manhattan on us.

Manhattan


Swirl with ice to chill, pour into a cocktail glass, and garnish with a maraschino cherry.